Losing my Nephew By Jodie

Date: 30-05-2020

Hi, I’m jodie and this is my story about my nephew Auley James. So I was on my way home from school when I found out my sister had given birth to a baby boy, after 3 girls! I laughed it off at first because there was never a mention of my sister being pregnant. However at the time I was told there were a few complications ( not to full extent) with Auley. I had a few questions straight away but my dad didn’t have the answers for me so it was a worrying waiting game to say the least. A couple days go by when me and my brother had arranged to go and visit Auley in the hospital. We made our way up and met my dad who took us to the neonatal department of the hospital. Before meeting Auley, I tried to think everything possible to try and ready myself because I didn’t know what to expect. Standing outside the room we were told to be very gentle and told to prepare as it was an emotional time. We went in one at a time and stood by the tiny little baby lying in his incubator with a blanket with lots of wires attached. I couldn’t imagine how hard it would’ve been for my sister and her partner at this time during the Christmas period, with having 3 young children going back and forth from the hospital. In fact that year Christmas was the last thing on our minds. Everyone’s focus was on Auley. A few days later I was told about the christening, it was in the hospital, that was quite hard, again I didn’t know what to prepare for, the small room filled with everyone who loved this little baby, seeing my sister holding my nephew and her partner with his arm around her. It was very emotional, a lot of tears were shed, but that’s okay. I was never scared to be upset over this cause I knew I wasn’t the only one. It’s always okay to be upset and it makes it less pressurising when you know there’s other people going through the same hurt. In the last few days of Auley being in hospital, and after a lot of consultation, the heartbreaking but blessing decision was Made, and that was for Auleys life support to be switched off. However it wasn’t until Auley was transferred into Robin house which is run by CHAS ( children’s Hospices Across Scotland) that the hardest time during this period was about to happen. The staff at Robin house were nothing short of outstanding. The care they provided for not only Auley but my whole family including myself was amazing. They were so welcoming and caring. Another couple days go by when I received a phone call from my dad who told me the news that Auley was no longer able to fight the big bad world and I burst into tears. I was so upset that my nephews time on the earth was coming to an end. It was a blessing for him but a hurt for us. Auley was too good for this world and took his last breath on the 31st of December 2018. On January 5th I went to build a bear and I made a little bear named Auley James, for my sister and her family, it was something to remember their angel by. Then the next day I went upto robin house to see Auley. It was very very hard for me knowing that Auley was no longer with us. However I felt it was my time to say goodbye. Then January 8th, the day of Auleys funeral, Me and my brother made our way to my sisters house where we all set off for the church. I remember listening to the priest talking but couldn’t keep my eyes off my sister for imagining what she was going through. As the service ended I watched my sister and her partner carry the tiny little coffin out of the church, and that’s when my emotions got the best of me. Making our way to the cemetery I was somewhat nervous, the burial started and the coffin was lowered, i threw a rose in as did the rest of the family, it again was very hard. The most important thing on that day was support. It was our time to support each other as a family and be there for one another, and we did just that, for anyone reading this I’d like you to know that’s it’s okay to feel upset and to find it hard to cope but as long as you’ve got support and support others, you just need to remember the positive and good times you’ve had. MySelf, my sister Dana, her partner Gary, my dad John and my brother Jonathan all took part in Glasgow’s 2019 15 mile kiltwalk in honour of Auley, we raised money for the charity “CHAS” and competed the walk. It was tough but I felt accomplished it was a great feeling. I think of my nephew every single day and forever will, and that’s the important part, think of all the positives there are over the negatives, and I can say that as long as you are around the people you love, it’ll get somewhat a little easier day by day.

 

Thank you for reading my story, I hope it helps you in some way, stay positive 💓